The Good Friend

Interpretations of a Simple Phrase

I've contemplated the meaning of the phrase "good friend" more than I'd like to admit over the past year or two. For many, a "good friend" is easy to define, as they may have several examples of one. I have five or more, but I've deeply pondered the extent to which each friendship means in my life. My perception of faltering close friendships due to lack of communication led me to believe that these relationships were less significant than I originally thought. However, I've since revised my thinking through reconnecting with them and realizing that a friendship can be just as strong as it once was, despite a potentially large gap in time since the last connection.My father's best advice was that you are the sum of your five closest friends. The catch is that you can't just wake up one day and decide that you want your five closest friends to be the likes of Elon Musk, Jeff Bezos, Ray Dalio, Warren Buffet, and Robert Downey Jr. Though that would be an impressive group, friendships don't work that way. My closest friends have come about through various means: a few from early upbringing, others more recent through work and endeavors, and one provided at birth - my brother, to whom I owe a great deal of my accomplishments.A "good friend" can be someone you call during troubling times or simply to catch up, even if there's nothing specific to discuss. The line between a "good friend" and just a friend is subjective and evolves as you age, blurred by the idiosyncrasies of individual friendships. In grade school, you might have ten or more "good friends," but as you age, this number may dwindle to five or fewer. However, these remaining friends may be twice as close as the larger group once was. You might now know more about these five friends than they even knew about themselves back in grade school, leading to more profound conversations and intellectual discourse.If this essay has sparked something in you regarding revisiting your relationship with someone who you thought was a close friend but haven't spoken to in a while, consider reaching out. So often in life, we only reach out to someone because of our own agenda. If we could put ourselves aside for a moment and check in with someone because of our genuine interest in their lives, the world will be a better place. Reach out to the friend you've lost touch with, because you care about how far they've come since you last spoke.